Hey, there! Originally, I was planning on a fun welcome back to school post, but just as there is a time for dancing, there is also a time for mourning (Ecclesiastes 3:4). What has horrified many people with the recent exploitation of abuse by members of the Catholic Church is the secrecy, cover-up, and silence of the Church over such terrible crimes. So as not to imitate this on my blog, I will not ignore, keep secret, cover-up, or be silent about the atrocious sins of our people. I must acknowledge it. See, I am honestly scared. Here I am, shouting from the rooftops that I love the Catholic Church when all around me, things are blowing up about crime, scandal, and sin within the Catholic Church. What will people think of me for loving the Church with this scandal? I look to our beloved Jesus and say, "Ah! Help! What is this? What do I think? What do I do?" I'm just going to give you my perspective. I have no authority and I can't label it as the truth. Authority and truth belong to God, as Jesus Christ the Son of God is Truth. This is simply the perspective of a young Catholic college student who loves the Body of Christ, the Church, but is hurting. I assume you know about self-harm. It is inflicting harm upon oneself and can come in the form of cutting, skin-picking, and scratching to name a few. I have been guilty of self-harm. During some of my depressive/obsessive/whatever-you-want-to-call-it episodes, I would hurt my body. I won't give details because I believe giving too many details can give other people who are hurting ideas and ruminations about what they could do. My body belongs to Christ. So, I hurt my body. I hurt Christ's body. Christ, in His love, offers me redemption and forgiveness when I repent in faith during the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Since I have repented of my sins of self-harm, resolved to not commit self-harm again, and have trusted in the mercy of God, Christ has purified me so that I, whose sins were like scarlet, are now as white as snow (Isaiah 1:18). Praised be to God. That is what the whole Bible teaches from the Old Testament to the New Testament: we sinful people who are unfaithful to God, are constantly loved and forgiven by God and despite our weakness, sin, and failure, are made like God! It's pretty incredible. In truth, it is a romance story. Haha, I love romance! Read the book of Hosea. It is about a prophet named Hosea who is told by God to marry a prostitute named Gomer. Gomer is unfaithful to Hosea, but each moment of unfaithfulness is followed by mercy and love from Hosea. Though Gomer constantly turns away from Hosea, Hosea does not turn away from Gomer. God wants Hosea to do such an incredible act to show the people of Israel a reflection of His love for Israel. Though Israel turns from Him, the Lord lovs Israel. Despite unfaithfulness, God is merciful and loving. In my own body and in my own life, I am Gomer. I am unfaithful to God but He is merciful and loving to me. So that is my body. I'm going to shift gears and talk about THE Body. The Body of Christ. The Church. I am a little part of the huge Body of Christ, made up of the faithful on earth, the faithful in purgatory, and the saints in Heaven. Since I am a member of the Body, let's figuratively think that I am a sliver of the rib (haha, get it? I'm a part of the rib. I'm a woman. Eve came from the rib of Adam! Funny? It made me smile...) So, my role is to be a sliver of the rib. Yours might be the knee-cap, a skin particle, a fingernail, a part of the esophagus, a part of the ankle bone, an arm muscle--I know there are scientific terms for this but you know that is not my strong suit! You get the point, we all make one Body. Christ is the Head of the Body, thank God. I say it again. Christ is the Head of the Body. Thank God. No priest, no pope, no sister, no layperson is the Head of the Body. It is Jesus Who wears the dazzling crown on His Head, King of Heaven and earth, and of all. Now, I just find it absolutely baffling that this King of the Universe, chooses US as His Body. He could have simply remained the Word. The Word is God. The Word Who was not created, but always was with God and was God (John 1:1). But the Word became flesh. And dwelt among us (John 1:14). Jesus, people! Jesus is God made flesh. Jesus is God taking on a body. And what does Jesus do when He takes on a body? He lays every particle of it down for us. He lays down His life for the unfaithful "Gomer" or "Israel." We kill His Body. But God, being God, the Resurrection and the Life Itself, rises from death. Not only this, He lays His Body down so physically and tangibly that He continuously offers us the Eucharist, His very Self so that we may be His Body! We become what we eat. If one part of the Body hurts, the whole Body hurts (1 Corinthians 12:26). With another rise of sexual abuse within the Catholic Church, our Church leaders have hurt our Body. They have inflicted horrific self-harm. Not just some little scratches. They have abused Our Body. Let's use this imagery: Say these accused priests are parts of the right hand of the Body. The hands have cut and scraped and torn and beat and whatever other verbs you wish to add, to the left arm of the Body. That left arm is on fire and screaming with pain. Even worse, imagine if the right hand is abusing the left arm and the left hand is doing nothing to prevent it! The left hand allows the right hand to abuse. Our whole Body, the Body of Christ is hurting because of what that right hand has done. We hurt even more because of what the left hand has done. We are crying and complaining and screaming in pain and confusion. For how can the Body hurt its own Body? The same way I willingly and knowingly have harmed my own body. What is the Head doing, we ask? If no priest or bishop is head of the Church, what is Christ doing? Christ, the Head is looking at the injured arm, examining the wounds. The Head is smelling the blood and sweat. The Head is hearing the moans of His members. The Head is speaking. Do you hear Him? Telling the members of His Body to act; to dress and cleanse the wounds of the left arm; that, and to STOP that right hand from inflicting harm to its own Body! But there is more! What about the Heart of the Body? Guys, call this weird, but I think it is awesome! I think this Body is so wonderful, so heavenly, so precious, and so powerful that the Body of Christ has TWO hearts! The first heart is the Sacred Heart of Jesus. The second is the Immaculate Heart of Mary, which imitates the Sacred Heart. What is pumping from these two giant hearts of love? Blood! The Precious Blood of Jesus. Yes, it sounds gruesome, but so was hanging Jesus on the cross, me inflicting harm on myself, priests committing abuse, and leaders covering-up abuse. So beneath each member of the Body is Precious Blood pumping, and the two Hearts are keeping our Body functioning and loving, even if members of the Body are inflicting self-harm. It is because of our free-will that Christ allows His Body to cause harm. It is because of His omnipotence and everlasting Love that He allows us to be a part of Him and His LOVE! Sharing this is painful but necessary: Our Heavenly Father is perfect. If we are to be a part of Him, we also must be perfect (Matthew 5:48). Well, guess what? I've tried and I can't be perfect. But one day I will be. And it won't be of any effort of my own. The only thing I will have to do with it is saying, "yes" to God. God is the One Who makes us perfect. If I say "yes" to Him, then He makes me new, He makes me a part of Him, and He makes me like His beautiful Self. If I say "no" to Him, I am saying "no" to being made perfect. Each member of the Body of Christ is either choosing perfection or choosing imperfection. If we choose perfection, our sins are forgiven and our greatest weaknesses will be glorified. If we choose imperfection, our part of the Body will be cut off. We will no longer be the Body, but we will be a dead member. For the Body is pure, perfect, humble, loving, true and good! ...Here I am, back for my Junior year at Central Michigan University. I'm just a little part of the Body of Christ. I plan on saying "yes" to my beloved Head, Christ, for the rest of my life. I am only a little sliver of the rib, though, so I'm quite a weakling and can't do much and regrettably will choose to harm the Body with some sort of sin again. But the Precious Blood of Jesus washes over me so that I may be forgiven and redeemed. The Head speaks Wisdom to me and gives me His Flesh so that I may become more like Him. Other members of the Body are really weak too. For some, those weaknesses will be made great strengths through our powerful Blood of Christ. For others, those weaknesses will be made even weaker through our not-powerful selves. I love the Body of Christ, the Church! I love the weak members and the strong members! As St. Paul says, when one member of the body is weak, the rest must help out and be strong (1 Corinthians 12)! Or in other words, when one messes up and sins, we must strive for virtue and love! Impurity is a weakness. Christ Jesus, my Head, make me a pure, spotless bride before You as You are the pure, spotless Lamb. I resolve to be pure! Make Gomer; make Israel; make the Church Your pure Bride. Dishonesty is a weakness. Christ Jesus, my Heart, make me vulnerable, open, honest, and true as You epitomize vulnerable honesty upon the Cross. I resolve to be honest! Make Gomer; make Israel; make the Church Your honest Body. Abuse is a weakness. Immaculate Mary, my Heart, pray that I will be nurturing, caring, and loving as you, Mother of God, stand by your Son's side during His weakest and greatest moment. I resolve to be nurturing! Pray that like Gomer; like Israel; we will indeed be Mother Church. Hatred is a weakness. Christ Jesus, my Precious Blood, make me loving, merciful, and forgiving as You are to the point of death. I resolve to be loving! Make Gomer; make Israel; make the Church one flesh with You Who Are Perfection.
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AuthorJacqueline St. Clare: I spent six months in a cloistered convent, and now I'm a college student! Archives
April 2021
SpiritualityVocationMental ILlnessSeasonalADVENT LENT
Unexpected Church MembersAll words that are underlined can be found on the "Glossary" page
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